IC Contact Post
Hello, you have reached Alex Stabile. If you wish for me to call you back, please leave your name and number, and I'll get back to you.
If you are a creepy stalker, please remain on the line, and breathe heavily into the receiver.
If you have no idea why you called, feel free to throw your phone against the wall, and go look at the pretty colors on the TV.
Hello, you have reached Raziel. I cannot come to the phone at the moment.
If you are another angel, please leave a message, and thank you for not invading my thoughts with your magic angel telepathy
If you are a demon, please stay on the line as I gleefully tell you how your name probably means something like 'Glass Laboratories', or 'I Conduct From a Tube'.
If you are a witch of some sort, no, I don't know how to make you fall in love.